Parenting with Art Resource: Have a Better Family Movie Night
I’ve shared the notes below with a few different people and realized it might be good to go ahead and share them here, too. The book I’m writing about parenting with art will be more literary while the information I share on this website will be more practical. If you use this Parenting with Art resource with your children or others when you discuss the films you watch together, I’d love to hear about it!
Make family movie night a ritual. Do it once a week or once a month or however often seems right for this season of life. Incorporate other rituals with it. Maybe eat the same special snacks every time and create your own family grading and ranking system that you use when you watch a film. Consider other creative ways to make this particular ritual unique for your family’s specific circumstances, needs, and preferences.
Use a few of these questions to go deeper with your family after you watch a film:
1. Why do you think [X Character] did [X thing]?
2. What did you like about [X part that you really like and/or think my generate some good discussion]?
3. What three things did you love about that movie?
4. What three things did you dislike?
5. What made you feel uncomfortable?
6. What made you feel safe?
7. What surprised you? Why? What were you expecting instead?
8. Which character from the movie is the hero? What do you like about that character?What do you dislike about that character?
9. Which character from the movie is the villain? What do you like about that character? What do you dislike?
(I think #8 & #9 are good ways to move toward talking about how people are complicated. We all have good traits and bad traits, faults and gifts.)
Then, after you talk about the movie specifically, try asking a question or two that moves toward more personal topics:
1. What's something from the past few months that you experienced that reminds you of something from that movie?
2. Mention an extreme feeling that a character from a movie had and ask when your son has felt the same way.
3. Mention an extreme feeling that a character from a movie had and describe a time when you felt the same way. (Or when your partner has felt the same way.)
4. Which scene from the movie feels most like your own life? Why?
5. Which scene from the movie feels most like the opposite of your own life? Why?
6. If you were going to write a sequel screenplay for this movie, what would you include?
7. Which character from the movie makes you want to learn something new? Why?
8. Which book or story have you read lately that has a similar theme?
9. How is this movie like [X movie, book, TV show]? How is it different?
10. If you could live inside this movie, what would your home be like?
*Thumbnail image for this post from by Houses Cheung on Unsplash.
Charlotte Donlon is a writer and a spiritual director for writers. Her current writing and work are rooted in noticing how art helps us belong to ourselves, others, God, and the world. Her first book, The Great Belonging: How Loneliness Leads Us to Each Other, was published in November 2020. Learn more about Charlotte, her writing, and her work at charlottedonlon.com and ourfaithinwriting.com. You can also sign up for her email newsletter and connect with her on Twitter and Instagram.